How to host a ‘friendsmas’ dinner – 9 ways to create a memorable evening for your chosen family to mark the festive season

You don’t choose your family. But you do choose your friends – and very often our friends become something of a chosen family to most of us. So it only makes sense to celebrate the festive season with them too, at least before we all part ways and go to our respective families for the Christmas holiday – and that, my friends, is what many refer to as ‘friendsmas’. So if you are looking to host one this year, I’ve put together a few friendsmas dinner ideas to help you make this get-together one to remember.

This wonderful Christmas idea will allow you and your friends to get together and be merry for one last time this year, perhaps exchange gifts (Secret Santa, anyone?), eat good food, reflect on the year and most importantly, have fun together.

‘While family Christmas is steeped in tradition (and perhaps a touch of formality), friendsmas is your chance to break all the rules,’ says Samantha Picard, Balsam Hill ambassador and founder of @tablescapeluvr. ‘Think of Friendsmas as Christmas's more relaxed cousin. It's that magical gathering before the actual holidays where friends come together to celebrate their chosen family. Usually happening in early to mid-December it's the perfect excuse to exchange gifts, share amazing food, and create memories before everyone heads off to their family Christmas celebrations.’

And this is how to go about creating the most enjoyable and stylish friendsmas for your chosen family if you’re hosting one this season. It’s going to be one for the books!

1. Create a drinks bar

A friendsmas dinner usually has a relaxed, party vibe – and what better way to get the party going than with some Christmas-themed cocktails? That’s why creating a designated space like a drinks bar where your friends can also help making these is the best way to go, whether that’s using a drinks trolley or a cleared console table.

‘Let's spice things up – literally! Create a signature spicy margarita bar with dried lime garnishes and chili-rimmed glasses. Set up interactive stations around your space like a DIY cocktail corner,’ Samantha at Balsam Hill says.

Angel Skillman, Shades of Cool London founder, adds, ‘I also love to create a signature festive cocktail or mocktail alongside wine and beer, something like spiced mulled wine or a cranberry and rosemary fizz at Christmas is always a winner.’

2. Whip up a series of sharing plates

Friendsmas is not a time for a formal dinner with organised courses. Instead, sharing platters passed around the table are more in keeping with the chilled vibe of the occasion.

‘For food, forget the formal sit-down dinner – think generous sharing plates that encourage mingling and conversation,’ Samantha advises.

Angel of Shades of Cool London continues, ‘Friendsmas should always feel effortless and fun as it's a celebration of friendship rather than a formal dinner party. My main tip would be not to overcomplicate it which will lead to stress. This can be done by keeping the food and menu simple, serving dishes that are easy to prepare and share, such as platters, or even doing a potluck-style feast where everyone contributes and each brings their favourite dish or snack.’

3. Have fun with the colour scheme and theme

I love a traditional Christmas colour scheme of red and green. But if that’s not necessarily your cup of tea or if you want to create a theme that’s a bit more playful and out there, friendsmas is the perfect time to do it and experiment a little.

‘If you want to go more colourful don't be scared of combining unexpected colours like greens with pops of pink or gold accents for a festive but fun look, friendsmas is a chance to be playful and have fun,’ Angel says.

The Christmas disco trend is also a great theme to incorporate into your festive celebration with friends. ‘Channel your inner disco this year with mixed metallics! Layer your table like a pro, starting with a shimmering foil fringe runner and mix and match gold and silver place settings,’ Samantha says.

4. Set up a mini Christmas tree for Secret Santa

‘If you've got room, set up a small tree with maximal decorations,’ Samantha at Balsam Hill suggests.

If you’re not spending Christmas day at home but rather are going to stay with family, you likely won’t be putting up your best artificial Christmas tree. But putting up an inexpensive miniature tree like this one from Argos on top of the living room sideboard where it won’t take up any extra floor space won’t hurt either. Especially if you are exchanging presents with your friends, as this will be the perfect place to put them.

5. Use photos as decor

Forget name cards – using pictures of your friends as place settings is so much more fun and adds that lovely personal touch that they are sure to cherish.

‘I love hosting my friends at Christmas time and always hope to make it an evening they won’t forget,’ says ceramic artist Esma Dereboy. ‘This year, I have decided I am going to have photos as name-cards and I am going to handwrite a little note to each guest with a memory from the past year. Something they can take away from the evening as a memory keepsake.’

But shared pictures can be used as decor in several different ways. ‘Another fun idea is to decorate your Christmas tree with photos of your favorite memories with your guests from the past year,’ says Chloe Barrow, interior expert at Laura James. ‘I think polaroids are perfect for this as they add a charming, vintage vibe.’

6. Create a centrepiece with dinner candles

Dining room lighting ideas are very important to get right in order to create the right ambience – and you can always rely on lit-up candlesticks to provide a cosy and intimate atmosphere while also creating a beautiful Christmas table centrepiece idea.

‘When it comes to decorating a festive tablescape, I think less is more. Focus on candlesticks – you can find candlestick holders at all different heights to add layers,’ Esma recommends.

7. Incorporate the bow trend

Bows are one of the biggest Christmas decor trends of this year – but they’re also one of the easiest Christmas (or friendsmas) decor ideas that will instantly elevate your tablescape.

‘Add some drama with oversized velvet bows in rich jewel tones as napkin holders,’ Samantha at Balsam Hill suggests.

But you can adorn your plates with napkins folded into a bow, tie ribbons into bows around the stems of wine glasses or incorporate a bow-shaped candle holder like this one from The Range. There are so many different ways to get creative with this trend!

8. Keep it simple

When it comes to the best Christmas table decor ideas for your friendsmas celebration, it’s best to not overcomplicate to maintain that casual feel – but also so that you can easily pack the decor away if or when games are to be played.

‘If your group is likely to dive into lively card games or party activities, consider keeping your table decor simple. A pre-made table runner and easy-to-move placemats can add style without creating too much fuss when it’s time to clear the table. You’ll thank yourself that you didn’t choose something more elaborate when you’re trying to pack it away to create space for games,’ Chloe at Laura James says.

9. Don’t forget about Christmas crackers

Last but not least, top your friendsmas tablescape with Christmas crackers to keep a bit of the Christmas tradition part of your seasonal celebration. Not to mention it’s one of the most fun Christmas traditions – so why wouldn’t you include it?

‘You cannot forget the Christmas crackers - this year I am going traditional with some chic gold crackers - they never fail to bring a sense of joy to a festive tablescape,’ Esma Dereboy explains.

Your friendsmas must-have checklist

Merry friendsmas to all that celebrate and their friends! Make it a good one.